When we don’t always agree with our kids….
My son joined the ARMY – I found out 48 hours prior as he didn’t know how to tell me. We were close however that is a lot of self reflection on my part. After seeing what the military did to my older brother who passed away from his injuries off the battle field from his mind. I swore my kids were never going and made them promise me. My sons father and I after much debate said he could go in after college. We were so adamant about it. Thinking our plan would be after college he wouldn’t want to go. However it was something he always wanted to do and a year after his first year in college signed up and didn’t tell us.
I wish I wasn’t so stern about it and naive or disgruntled by telling him we are not talking about it and laid down the law. I see how far that law got his father and I.
I hate surprises and I also hate I wasn’t there for my son, when he was so passionate about joining the armed services and let my own feelings get in the way. I have since learned in these short weeks to be openminded to my kids. Even though we might not agree to at least let them know they can come to me.
My son made a big decision on his own and as proud as he was, he didn’t share because he knew we would be in his mind disappointed. Which is far from the truth.
I’m glad his father told (he got short notice too) and I was able to reach out to my son and tell him how proud I am of him and that I’m sorry.
Today is a hard day and I don’t know why. I’m missing my boy today. He’s 19 in boot camp training to defend our country and all I have his my little boy in mind who loved Ben 10, Pokémon, camping, history, cooking and how I was his world. Now he’s part of our World defending it.
Today is tough couldn’t stop crying this morning!
Let my story be an example to you. That even though we might not agree with our kids because of our own fear or expectations to always let them know regardless you support them. I wonder what the difference would have been if I was more open to the topic, maybe I would have been at his swearing in….or perhaps we could have made a plan. I don’t know but it’s a lesson for me, a hard one.
